We have just had a conversation in the office about what words we classed as swear words and which we classed as rude words and how we go about classifying them. It centered around WANKER. Which I think is surely a rude rather than a swear. However I wouldn’t be happy about a child saying it which I think would be a factor in the classification.
Anyway this led to my story about mine and my brothers Christmas swears. This was a system implemented by my mother when we were little in which if we didn’t do any swears in our day to day life like some of the other rougue kids on the estate we would be entitled to a Christmas swear. The excitement of saying one swear word on Christmas day. I took full advantage and first thing Christmas morning before opening gifts would normally opt for ‘Fuck rudolph ate his carrot’. My brother was playing the long game though, he saved his Christmas swears for 5 years and then unleashed around the dinner table at my grandmothers in front of all the lovely old dears.
My whole office is appalled. Was my mother wrong to allow this? Should we have had a blanket ban on all swears? I don’t know. Opinions?
Nanny: You can phone ahead on the train to book special assistance getting on and off.
Me: I think that’s for the disabled…
Nanny: Well if you will insist on taking that big bag and tent camping with you.